Growing Up
by Milotic
Summary: Ash and Brock discuss growing up late one night. Slight AAML. Short one-shot.


Growing Up

Disclaimer: I do not own Pokémon. I do, however, own this story.

The stars twinkled brightly that night, each appearing as a tiny speck of light among the vast inky blackness. A chill permeated the air, and a harsh breeze tousled the leaves on the trees, creating an illusion of invisible phantoms and other creepy things.

_Boy, if Misty were here she'd be petrified that a bug Pokémon was going to sneak up on her and gross her out…_

With that last satisfying thought, Ash Ketchum closed his eyes and began to enter the mysterious realm of sleep…

"Ash!"

A deep male voice, barely louder than a whisper but forceful all the same, suddenly jousted Ash from his reverie.

"Brock, what is it? Why are you whispering?"

"I don't want Dawn to hear us," Brock replied.

Glancing at the tent several feet away from where Ash and Brock lay in their sleeping bags, Ash noticed that the shadow of their female companion did not stir.

"I think she's asleep, Brock, so don't worry. What did you want to talk about?" Ash asked, curiosity getting the best of him.

Brock suddenly inched his way towards Ash, dragging himself and his sleeping bag along the ground until he was mere centimeters from Ash and his sleeping bag.

"Brock, what's up with you, man? You're acting all weird."

"Listen, Ash, I think it's time we had The Talk," Brock stated solemnly, a frown etched across his face.

"What do you mean, 'The Talk?' What talk?" Ash was thoroughly mystified now. His friend sure was being strange.

"Um, you know, Ash…The Talk," Brock answered, frustration evident in his voice.

"Oh, you want to talk about my strategy against Fantina! Well, OK, I'm going to have Buizel use Aqua Jet all over the stadium so Fantina's Pokémon can't use Hypnosis on mine…but I've told you that already," Ash ended, scratching his head and smiling foolishly.

"Damn it, Ash! I'm not talking about your strategy against Fantina; we've been over that a million times! I'm talking about the Pidgey and the Beedrill!"

If Ash had been in motion at that moment he would have frozen completely. A cold sweat broke out on his forehead. He turned deathly white.

Noticing Ash's shocked state, Brock, completely undeterred, decided to press on.

"Yes, Ash, the Pidgey and the Beedrill! It's about time we had this talk. You're a young man now, and you need to know the facts!" Brock uttered in desperation.

"But Brock…"

"No 'buts' about it. We need to have this talk, Ash; it's long overdue."

Ash crawled deep inside his sleeping bag so that his face was completely covered. All he could do was articulate a simple "no."

"Well, we're having this talk whether you like it or not," Brock began. "First we'll start with the really basic stuff. You may have noticed that your body's been undergoing some changes--"

Ash groaned from inside his sleeping bag. "Nope, no changes here."

"—Like how you've gone through a growth spurt," Brock stated wisely.

"I have not gone through a growth spurt!" Ash replied indignantly.

"Right…that's why you can barely fit in you sleeping bag anymore and you have to have your mother send new sneakers and clothing almost every month."

"I'm a healthy growing boy…so what?" Ash retorted.

"There's also the fact that your voice is breaking. Soon you'll have a nice deep voice like mine," Brock continued sagely.

"Is not," Ash stated, although the "not" came out in a squeaky and high voice very much unlike his own. Brock could not see this, but deep inside Ash's (now too short) sleeping bag the future Pokémon Master turned a bright shade of crimson.

"I rest my case," Brock chuckled.

Ash remained in resentful silence for quite a while. So what if he had grown a little and his voice seemed to be playing funny tricks on him? That did not mean he was going through the "P" word. No way, no how.

"You may also notice yourself having an interest in girls," Brock went on.

"If growing up means I have to be like you then I don't want anything to do with it!"

Undismayed, Brock, who was used to such threats to his ego, continued on. "Yes, Ash, girls. You'll find yourself thinking about them a lot, fantasizing about them, even having strange dreams about them."

This sure piqued Ash's interest. The Pokémon trainer's head slowly emerged from his sleeping bag.

"Strange dreams?" Ash finally piped up.

As he was extremely fascinated by what Ash was going to say next, Brock knew he had to tread carefully.

"Have you been having strange dreams about girls, Ash?"

Again Ash turned a bright shade of red. "Well, no, I mean, I don't know…it's just sometimes I have weird dreams about Misty, and when I wake, um, my pants are all wet." Ash paused for a moment, but decided that he had to ask Brock the next question or else he may never learn its answer. "Do you know why that is, Brock?"

Brock snickered. "Strange dreams about Misty, huh? It looks like our Ash is finally growing up; he has his very first crush!"

"What?! I do not have a crush on Misty!" Now Ash's face was really flushed.

"Uh huh. Listen, Ash, I know about these things. Anyway, about the wet pants…that's your body's way of ejaculating semen; it means—"

"Lalala, not listening!" Ash had covered his ears, again retreating back into his sleeping bag.

"—you're having a spontaneous orgasm. Ash, are you even listening to me?"

"Uh, yeah, nice talk, Brock. Is that a Nurse Joy over there in the woods?"

"Joy? Where?"

Ash pointed deep into the woods. "In there."

"Uh, listen. I'll be right back, OK, Ash?" Brock darted off towards the deepest part of the woods.

The stars twinkled brightly that night, each appearing as a tiny speck of light among the vast inky blackness. A chill permeated the air, and a harsh breeze tousled the leaves on the trees, creating an illusion of invisible phantoms and other creepy things.

_Boy, if Misty were here she'd be petrified that a bug Pokémon was going to sneak up on her and gross her out…Misty…_

Ash smiled at his thoughts. Maybe growing up wouldn't be so bad after all…

"Joy, where are you?"

Well, as long as he didn't turn out like Brock.

The End

Author's Note: That was my first attempt at a humorous fic, so hopefully it isn't too bad. I hope the rating's appropriate. I mean, I know there's some sexual stuff in here, but it's not like it isn't anything that kids don't know by the time they're in junior high school.

Anyway, I have lots of work to do and my break's almost over (sob), so I'd better get to it.

I hope you all take the time to review. See you again sometime. :)


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